Let's talk nursing homes

Went shopping for this a few years back before my Ps passed away. A few things come to mind.1) Quality of place and service of private pay is starkly better than medicare/aid supported locations. They are segregated. The two groups are not housed in the same building or even location. The medicare/aid places noticeably sadder.... 2) Be wary of places that want you to make large sum dollar 'investments' with little to no further payments. What is their incentive to give a resident the best care or to prolong life if they already have the bulk of the residents assets? Proctor place certainly looked intriguing. They provide care from the most minimal assisted living care all the way through 'skilled nursing' (which is the medical/legal term for nursing home). You make a large investment and they are committed to care for your loved one until they pass away. What are the safeguards to ensure your loved one gets the best care when they hit a rough spot? They have a strong financial interest to speed things along... but comfortably and compassionately... to the afterlife.There is strong research that families and caregivers often do time a family members passing to specific financial milestones.3) First visit all the locations without your loved one. They are going to give you a tour and their sales pitch. Break from the script and make an effort to talk to residents you come accross. Then after you have screened them... do another visit with your loved one.4) In my view all of the locations oversell group activities. They pitch that your loved one will have plenty of socializing and activities... look at the actual schedule... make it part of the questioning in #3. Bingo and more bingo sucks... Bored seniors live shorter lives. See #2. The residents at the Medicare funded places looked especially bored and neglected.5) Research lawsuits and complaints against the locations. Determine for yourself based your own du diligence whether those complaints have merit.6) Senior living places do no pay well... they do not have the best nurses and caregivers money can buy. Proctor Place might be an exception... because their buy in is so high.7) Make sure someone in the family has power of attorney and power of health care decisions. Do not sign that over to the facility. Seniors can be in a vulnerable state living in these locations. Unfortunately some will take advantage of that.8) Do not reside in Nevada... just sayin. The laws there make it particularly easy to exploit seniors.9) Research the financial health of the company running these locations. They are notorious for going bankrupt.10) There are not nearly enough locations for the coming wave of seniors needing assisted living. There are wait lists... if you think you might want to transition to assisted living (which is not the same as skilled nursing) you might want start looking now. Wait lists can be in the years at this point.

My own personal observations over the years.... paternal grandparents and uncle both went through county funded medicare supported nursing homes (not in Peoria or Sangamon counties). The people who run those places have a difficult job. I do not entirely fault them. The places were awful. My maternal grandparents also went through a county funded location but it was better run I suppose... better funded perhaps. It was a little better. The food was still awful... the residents terribly bored. Lots of hallway sitting.... waiting.... doing... NOTHING.When you bring your kids its like passing a bunch of homeless people.... instead of begging for money they are begging for attention, conversation... love?... they are generally very happy to see children about. So many have no family left or their family does not visit. It could be creepy at times too. Very awkward. Really its going to get worse in a couple decades... because more people only have one child or none at all.Another thing to look for with regards to skilled nursing is if the location treats people who are not seniors. I visited a place in Normal that very specifically noted that they treat athletes and severe trauma victims who need a skilled nursing place to heal and recover. They worked with the aged too.... I feel like the staff were more positive, had better moral... which is good for the patient residents. The workers viewed their work as helping people transition back to independent living rather than a final step to the end. There was more talk of getting people back to assisted living rather than hospice.My conclusion is that I never want to be placed in these places ever...

Another anectodal thing...When we visited Proctor Place years ago... we met one of the residents... it was random... she just happened to around that day... she was in her late 50s... not really in need of assisted living at all. I think she was a retired nun.... a nun with enough money to buy into Proctor. She had a car... two bedroom apartment in Proctor.... in the independent living wing of the place. She bought in as an investment... no family.. no kids... she travelled. Lots of travel. Proctor was her home base.. and she felt assured that as she did become less mobile... Proctor would be there for the transition from independent living to assisted living. So I guess... its not always the very old signing up for some of these places.

here in pekin there is a state run nursing home. i would not let my dog stay there. enemy yes, dog no. horrible horrible place.

Mahkno : Thanks for taking the time, I appreciate it. I'll take that all into consideration.