Dating values.... ? on the Peoria.com Forums - Page 3

I agree, thats when people get hurt and your real feelings are masked. But when the time comes and you feel you can give of yourself, you can't live in the past.

Isn't that contradictory to what you said earlier?

Christi- I think these two guys just wanted to get laid. If that is what you want go for it, if you don't then don't. You are making all of this way to complicated. It takes 2 to play a game, if you don't want to play the game then don't participate.

You have to set your expectations and if a guy doesn't meet them then let him go.

There are jerks everywhere- ignore them. If you do what you've always done, then you get what you've always gotten. If you want something different - something better - then put that out there.

I agree whole-heartedly when its comes to playin' games...where does it get ya? Just more confused, thats where!!

I think that's what I just said. No complications at all as far as I'm concerned. I think I deserve better and that means they failed to meet my expectations. Isn't that what I said? hmmmm... sometimes I wonder about this whole online communications thing.

Agreed Conrad

Then I guess I don't understant what you are trying to say. Are you saying you don't want a one night stand? That you want a relationship?

Conrad

I am saying I deserve more than a one night stand.

If I can further clarify my stand on “changing” men to meet your expectations. I think I put it up there from the start. This is what I want. This is what I expect, if they choose to try to be that man and fail, that’s on them they did not qualify. I don’t want to invent a perfect man out of a substandard one. I want the perfect man. Period. Nothing more, nothing less. The perfect man for me. He can have flaws, just not flaws that are contrary to the boundaries I’ve set in my life. Just as men I might be interested in may not consider me to be up to snuff. I have to accept that. If I don’t meet their standards I’d be a fool to pretend I do. Don’t you think? Lies or a created façade will only lead to heartache and who needs that.

If your looking for the perfect man Christi, good luck cuz' he's NOT out there anymore than the perfect woman is!!

A man does not have to be perfect for me to love him, as long as he treats me right, treats me like the lady I am, as long as we can enjoy one another, laugh together, respect one another, and want the same things out of life, I AM HAPPY!!

I think it's already been said but, YOU are in charge of your body. If you don't want the guys around that's YOUR choice. If you don't think they are worth it, that's YOUR call. If you want a quick bang, that's your call too. Quit analyzing things and enjoy life a bit. It's too short as it is.

"Quit analyzing things and enjoy life, it's to short as it is"

BINGO!!BINGO!!

EXACTLY! A man doesn't have to be perfect to love him Flip. But they have to meet your expectations. That includes your perception of perfect. I'm not talking about Greek god looks, amazing wealth, the brain of Einstein and the virtue of the Pope (though it would be nice) it's not a criteria. I'm talking about someone who meets your expectations and is your idea of perfect. And yes, he DOES exist. Have we found him yet? HA! Probably already turn him down my luck. I've outlined what I feel I want in a man and many virtues you may feel are necessary may not be a requirement for me and vise versa. But the point is... do we KNOW what we want in a man? And if we define what perfect is do we stick to our guns or compromise our standards?

And SC, I have to disagree I think I've failed miserably to analyze it enough, which is why I'm where I am today. Wondering if the "perfect" man exists.

Leslie, I'm not saying I wouldn't grab a one nighter to satiate an urge that's primal, I'm saying I don't want a one nighter. I deserve better than to compromise my standards for a moment of pleasure even if it's the most memorable night of sex permissible. Does that make sense?

Christi, "I" know what "I" want in a man and I stated them above, their simple things, because I'm not perfect and I don't expect him to be either...

I'm sure you have gained a sense of the kind of attributes you are NOT seeking, or you've got a good sense of who is NOT right. Go with that and move in the opposite direction.