Sad on the Peoria.com Forums

One of my clients has had hospice coming in twice weekly for some time now. We all know what the end result is. Lately though she has been declining faster. I talked to the nurse and hospice wants to arrange a meeting with everyone in the house as what to expect through the process Not sure I can deal with this, I love her dearly and she has always been partial to me for some reason. She has already pretty much stopped eating, she still eats VERY little.

When I worked in Assisted Living, it was always hard when s Resdident passed away,its very hard to not get attatched and theres no way you 'can't' get attatched...I understand what your feeling Adnilem.

You make me think of the caregivers and hospice that entered the last week of my Mom's life. The caregivers took her death hard but said she will always have a imprint in their hearts.
The not eating I had with her toward the end. I believe it is their last way they can control their fate, in other words they are ready.

My client went home with family about two weeks ago after declining at a fast rate. She lost her battle friday morning at 9:30am I have never dealt with a death like this. Not only is her family involved, but her "family" at the home is involved! When you are hurting and have someone come to you and say "I miss (name)" How do you not cry? How do you go to their old room and not cry? How do you watch their roommate stare at their bed then go scream and not cry? It's been very hard, I will miss her very much!

You go ahead and cry, adn. It is a sad time. Sorry.

i know the heartache i got attached to a lady at the home my gmas in now . she was our bingo pal and she passed away and i cried and cried . i went to her funeral and new none of her family but they welcomed me w open arms .

You are the kind of employee that a resident's family truly values. I know this because I came to appreciate all the love that was shown to my dad during his last months by the employees at the home where he was staying. You know employees like you care for your loved one by the little things they do that mean so much. They make your loved one as comfortable as can be, they put on his favorite music, they get him an extra pillow because they sense he's uncomfortable by his fidgeting even when he can't voice that he's uncomfortable, they stop by his room and open the shades to let more sunlight in on a quiet day, they take him to social gatherings at the home even when he can no longer participate...and they HUG your loved one. It's not expected or required or probably even suggested, but people like you go above and beyond and it is appreciated. And when our loved one passes, we do remember people like you.

Ditto. SAHM is 100% correct.

Thank you guys! You truly are a great bunch!! Tonight is my first night back to work since her funeral, which means her side of the room will be all gone. I'm going to break down all over again! They did write a night poem on her service though, even if you don't believe anything its nice. God looked around his garden, and he found an empty place. Then he looked around the earth, and saw your tired face. He put his arms around you and lifted you to rest. God's garden must be beautiful, he always takes the best. He knew that you were suffering, he knew you were in pain, he knew that you would never get well on earth again. He saw the road was getting rough, and the hills were hard to climb. So he closed your weary eyelids, and whispered "peace be thine." It broke our hearts to lose you. But you didnt go alone, for part of us went with you, the day God called you home" It is funny how when you are in training they suggest you not get to close to the people you care for. It's hard not to when you see them almost everyday, and they look to you for help. I want to stay in the smaller focus my whole life!! So I can give each one of my people the same love! I could go on about my job forever. Again, thank you for letting me talk and for the wonderful responses! It wouldn't let me enter it paragraph style

Find some comfort that you helped someone enjoy a quality of life that could have been lacking had they been in someone elses care. I bet you brought many smiles to that resident's face. You sound like such a kind person. The world needs more caring people.